Raising Support as a Single Woman: Not for the Faint of Heart

Recognizing and overcoming three common mindsets can help churches and individuals to encourage single missionaries.

Raising missionary support gives us a front-row seat to God’s lavish generosity and faithfulness.

It can be a rich season that deepens and strengthens our trust as we see him act powerfully on our behalf.

Support raising can also be daunting, frustrating, overwhelming, and seemingly endless. Both of these aspects are true. Both realities can sometimes be felt simultaneously—by every missionary, regardless of gender, marital status, age, or calling.

And yet, there is one for whom the challenges and discouragements are often compounded: the single woman missionary.

In my personal experiences and those of the many women I’ve talked to, three recurring mindsets contribute to making support raising extra challenging for single women: the emphasis on church planting, the allure of the family unit, and what I’ll call the “one-woman show” phenomenon.

The Pastor and the Church-Planting Movement

Whereas medical missions was once the popular all-star of missionary job descriptions, church planting seems to have become the new frontrunner. I do not intend to diminish this role. Church planting is vital, biblical, and of the utmost importance in spreading the gospel.

However, since a single woman can be neither a pastor nor a lead church planter, she can often be made to feel that her calling is less important. Many single women have been told outright that they won’t even be considered for financial support because their focus isn’t one of these two highly regarded roles. Not only can this feel like a no-win situation, but it also communicates that her ministry isn’t taken seriously or is seen as less valuable. Not surprisingly, this can be incredibly discouraging.

A Challenge for Supporters 

Consider making a list of the different needs and tasks involved in a church-planting project aside from preaching. How many of these can be done by a single woman, who potentially has more time and capacity than some of her married teammates? Whether her main ministry focus is nursing, teaching, Bible translation, or directing a crisis pregnancy center (to name a few), both her active involvement in church ministry and her investment in relationship building are significant and instrumental to church-planting efforts, even though she’ll never preach from the pulpit.

While your church has every right to determine the types of mission work and ministries it will support, please be aware of how you communicate this. Will you ask God to help you recognize and celebrate that fact that single women are a powerful force for the gospel?

The Allure of the Family Unit

Sadly, in the church and on the mission field, there can be an “us vs. them” mentality between married and single people. This topic merits an article of its own, but I want to address a few of the dynamics that relate specifically to support raising.

I believe all single and married missionaries would agree that we are not in competition because our God is unlimited, and his generosity and resources are boundless. There’s more than enough to go around. However, there is often a feeling among single women that the missionary couple and family are more appealing prospects to a potential supporting church.

While it may not be communicated directly, this preference and its impact appear in churches in various ways. A single woman will often be given only a few minutes to share her ministry, while a couple or family may be given an entire service, mainly if the husband is also preaching. It is also common for a married woman to be given more opportunity and access than a single woman. Once again, these realities can be very discouraging and frustrating for a single woman who wants to share the call God has put on her heart and invite others into partnership.

A Challenge for Supporters 

Is this phenomenon a surprise to you? Is this true of your church or missions committee? If so, please take a moment to consider why. Are you willing to intentionally consider practical ways to make space for and value the single women currently supported by your church and those who may ask to be?

The One-Woman Show

I’m just going to say it: support raising can be all-consuming, especially when you’re first trying to get to the field. This is true even when two people are sharing the load. It takes courage, tenacity, patience, creativity, and resilience. You can see where I’m going with this. The single woman missionary is tackling this challenge alone.

Is she fearful of speaking in public? It doesn’t matter because she has no choice. Is she unfamiliar with or uncomfortable with technology? Too bad, she needs to learn. She has to do it all by herself: the initial calls and emails, the follow-up, the preparation, the presenting, the thank-you notes. You get the idea.

There is a tangible way to be sensitive to and aware of her needs in this process. Realize that the best response to a request for financial support is . . . a response. While finding out that a church or individual cannot consider financial support can be discouraging, it is also appreciated. That may sound surprising, but it’s true. Clarity is kindness.

When a single missionary receives a clear “no” from someone she has reached out to, it lightens her load because she no longer has to worry about follow-up. Believe it or not, follow-up can be more challenging than the initial ask. Your clear response frees her to focus her time and energy elsewhere.

A Challenge for Supporters

Realize that while financial support is unavoidable, it is not her only—or even greatest— need. I recently contacted a church and conversed with the missions pastor. Before the call, he told me up front that the church couldn’t take on new missionaries at this time. But, he said he would still like to hear about my ministry if I was willing to share.

Our conversation was so encouraging to me! Shortly afterward, he connected me with a single woman from their church who was interested in missions. He showed me that he saw value and significance in my work. That meant just as much, if not more, than a check. Consider: How can you have this kind of positive impact on the life of a single woman missionary, even if you can’t support her financially? Can you be an advocate for her by telling other pastors or individuals about her ministry? Advocacy can be incredibly helpful. One of my greatest desires in establishing the Flourish ministry is to be a voice and advocate for single women missionaries.

I pray that what you’ve read will help you become more aware of and sensitive to the realities facing your sisters in Christ who faithfully serve the Lord in missions. I pray that you will look for tangible ways to affirm and value the ministries of the single women who reach out to you, even if you don’t choose to support them financially. I ask God to help you see how to intentionally make room for and welcome single women who want to share their ministries and those whom you currently support.

Lastly, I hope you will grow in your desire to advocate for the single women missionaries you meet. May you recognize their obedience to God’s call and seek to accompany and encourage their faithfulness even if you can’t contribute financially to their ministry. Raising support as a single woman is a significant challenge, but God can use you to help her feel empowered, heard, and valued for his glory and her good.


Editor’s Note: This article was originally posted by ABWE EveryEthne on December 12, 2024.

Mandi Vermilyea

Mandi Vermilyea grew up in Quebec City as a missionary kid. God called her to return to Canada to serve with ABWE in Montreal in 2016, where she develops relationships with people in her community through means such as book clubs, teaching English, and volunteering at Meals on Wheels. She is also actively involved in her French-speaking church, most recently with single women. She launched the Flourish ministry in early 2023 with the desire to support, encourage and strengthen single women serving with ABWE on the mission field. Support Mandi’s ministry.